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Feedback on Your Feedback

Jen Sanders
Feedback on Your Feedback
Feedback on Your Feedback

Giving and receiving feedback is a universal part of our daily lives and one that constantly shapes our growth and development. Whether in professional settings, personal relationships, or casual interactions, feedback plays a crucial role in communication and improvement. What is the last piece of feedback you received or offered, and how did that go? The experiences can range from frustration and confusion to gratitude and growth. Learning to give more effective feedback can help differentiate and propel leaders, team members, and individuals forward in all personal and professional interactions. Consider the principles below to take your feedback skills to the next level and create a culture where feedback is welcomed, valued, and acted upon. 

 

Why Feedback Matters 

Feedback serves as a catalyst for personal and professional development. It helps individuals recognize their strengths and areas for improvement, ultimately fostering a culture of continuous learning. In workplaces, organizations that encourage feedback see increased employee engagement, improved performance, and stronger relationships among team members. Yet, despite its importance, many people struggle to provide or receive feedback in a way that leads to positive change. Mastering this skill requires intentionality, clarity, and a genuine desire to support growth. 

 

Use Actionable Language that Focuses on Behaviors, Not Personality 

One of the most effective ways to enhance the quality of feedback is by using behaviorally focused action words.  Encouraging action by framing feedback in terms of actionable steps can significantly impact how the recipient understands and applies it. When giving feedback, be specific about what the person did or said rather than making vague statements. For example, instead of saying, “You were rude during yesterday’s meeting,” clarify what actions were perceived as rude. A more constructive way to phrase this feedback would be, “During the meeting yesterday, you continued to interrupt Bob while he was speaking, and you were texting on your phone multiple times.” 


Using action-oriented language provides clarity around what happened and offers a clear path forward. This makes it easier for the individual to take meaningful action. Actionable feedback is not only more effective but also reduces misunderstandings and defensiveness. By focusing on observable behaviors rather than personal attributes, feedback givers can create a productive dialogue that fosters learning and development. 

 

Be Specific 

Vague or general feedback often leads to confusion or misinterpretation. Telling someone, "You need to improve your performance," is ambiguous and leaves the recipient uncertain about what specifically needs to change. Instead, pinpoint the issue by using clear, concrete examples. Consider this example: Instead of saying, “You need to be more reliable,” try, “I noticed that you missed two project deadlines last month, which impacted our ability to meet client expectations. Let’s discuss how we can ensure deadlines are met moving forward.” This approach ensures that feedback is not only precise but also provides the recipient with actionable steps to improve. 


Specific feedback also demonstrates that you are paying attention and are genuinely invested in the recipient’s growth. It reduces the chances of defensiveness because the conversation is based on facts rather than assumptions or personal judgments. Clarity in feedback helps individuals understand what they need to do differently, increasing the likelihood of positive change. 

 

Be Timely 

Timing is a critical factor in delivering effective feedback. Feedback should be given as soon as possible after the event while the details are still fresh. Waiting too long can dilute the impact of the feedback and make it harder for the recipient to recall specific actions. 

Most people struggle to remember what they had for dinner a few days ago—expecting someone to recall specific behaviors or incidents weeks or months later is unrealistic. Providing feedback promptly allows individuals to reflect on their actions, understand the consequences, and make necessary adjustments. Additionally, timely feedback prevents small issues from escalating into larger problems.  For example, if an employee consistently arrives late to meetings, addressing the issue promptly allows for course correction before it becomes a chronic problem. Saying, “I’ve noticed that you’ve been arriving five to ten minutes late to our team meetings over the past two weeks. Is there something we can do to help ensure you’re on time?” opens a constructive dialogue and provides an opportunity for improvement. 


Important Reminder: If you’re waiting until a performance evaluation to give feedback, you’re missing the mark. Feedback should be ongoing, not a once-a-year event. By the time an evaluation takes place, most feedback should already be familiar, as key issues or areas for improvement should have been addressed in real-time throughout the year. 

 

Delivering Feedback with Intent 

While being specific, actionable, and timely are essential, the tone and delivery of feedback are equally important. The way feedback is communicated can determine whether it is received positively or met with resistance. Approach feedback with empathy and a genuine intent to support the individual’s growth.  One effective way to structure feedback is by using the acronym BIB

  • Behavior: Explain the specific behavior observed.  Share what the individual DID or SAID. 

  • Impact: Discuss the effect of the behavior on you, others, or the organization. 

  • Behavior: Explain the specific behavior expected or desired going forward. Share what the feedback recipient should DO or SAY in the future. 


For example:  

"During yesterday’s team meeting, you spoke over Bob multiple times while he was presenting (Behavior), which made it challenging for him to clearly communicate his points and disrupted the discussion flow (Impact). Moving forward, I encourage you to wait until the designated Q&A time to share your thoughts (Behavior)."This method ensures clarity, reduces defensiveness, and keeps the focus on behaviors rather than personal traits. 

 

Offer Both Positive and Constructive Feedback 

Leaders should not only address areas for improvement but also recognize strengths. A well-balanced approach helps reinforce positive behaviors while motivating individuals to develop further. Beyond improving performance, offering positive or supportive feedback to your employees can: 

  1. Boost Morale and Motivation: Positive feedback reinforces good behavior and encourages employees to keep performing well. It helps them feel valued and recognized for their efforts, which can increase job satisfaction and motivation. 

  2. Enhance Team Culture: Consistently giving positive feedback contributes to a culture of appreciation and support within a team. This can improve collaboration, create a positive work atmosphere, and make employees more likely to support one another. 

  3. Prevent Burnout: Focusing only on what’s wrong can demoralize employees and potentially lead to burnout. Positive feedback offers balance, helping to prevent frustration and reinforcing the value of effort and progress. 

 

Encouraging a Feedback-rich Culture 

Creating a workplace or environment where feedback is encouraged and valued requires more than just giving occasional critiques. It involves fostering a culture where feedback is a two-way street—both giving and receiving feedback should be seen as opportunities for growth rather than personal attacks. 


One of the best ways to foster a feedback-rich culture is to practice what is called feedforward. Leaders often say, “I always welcome your feedback; my door is always open.” However, many direct reports hesitate to provide feedback because the request is too vague. To overcome this, leaders can use a technique called feedforward, which involves proactively seeking specific feedback on a particular area for improvement. 


For example, a leader might say, “I know I have a tendency to multitask at times and may not always notice it. I want to improve in this area and would appreciate your help. If you notice me doing this, please let me know so I can increase my awareness and make meaningful changes.” 


By making a targeted request, leaders create a safe and structured environment that encourages constructive feedback and personal growth. 


Here are a few additional ways to promote a feedback-rich culture: 

  1. Normalize Feedback: Encourage regular feedback conversations rather than reserving them for formal evaluations. 

  2. Train Teams: Provide training on how to deliver and receive feedback effectively. 

  3. Create Safe Spaces: Foster an environment where people feel comfortable providing honest input without fear of retribution. 

  4. Acknowledge and Act on Feedback: Show appreciation for feedback received and demonstrate a willingness to implement changes based on it. 


Feedback is a cornerstone of development and effective relationships. When delivered thoughtfully, it can inspire growth, enhance performance, and strengthen connections. By learning the art of feedback, you can become a more effective leader, colleague, and communicator, contributing to a culture of continuous improvement and success. Embrace feedback as an opportunity to grow and encourage those around you to do the same. 


At SZH Consulting, we help clients master the art of feedback by fostering a culture of open, constructive dialogue. Through tailored training, coaching, and real-world application, we equip leaders and teams with the skills to give and receive feedback effectively—driving growth, collaboration, and lasting impact. If you are interested n partnering with us to build future ready leaders and organizations, please Contact Us!

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